So, it’s been established on this blog that, doooohoooohooood, fly fishing is the most epic thing ever. But what does the world at large think of this noble pursuit we love?
What is the public’s view of fly fishing, really?
Answer: I don’t really know.
I think that fly fishing is so incredibly awesome that it deserves odes, epics and haikus dedicated to the trout I’ve loved and let slip away. Even line-snapping defeats make me want to write T-Swift style country-pop songs dedicated to all those trout that did me wrong, especially when they shake it off or remind me we are never ever ever getting back together. That got weird.
Well that just proves my point on the matter. My personal perspective on the art of angling with line and fly is so incredibly biased that I literally cannot conceive of a world where people just automatically assume that a Klinkhammer is an iron-era tool used to smithy Bavarian horseshoes.
Luckily, anytime I have a question on perspective, I have the solution. I refer to the ultimate bible of realism, stock photography.
Stock photographers are modern-day documentarians behind the lens, the absolute masters of depicting reality and helping us share it in Power Point. So, let’s see how these masters of stock photography define fly fishing.
Fly Fishing Stuff is Freaking Old
All fly fishing stuff was apparently made circa 1947. Fly fishing stuff is made of rubber, cork, wicker, wood, and old old khaki. It is always kept outdoors, on a dock, in a loosely organized pile.
Stock Photographer: “We need a box for flies.”
Stock Photographer’s Assistant: “We don’t have an old fly box and we all know fly fishing stuff is really old.”
Stock Photographer: “Ok, well just throw the crappiest plastic box you can find up on top there, but at least put some old crappy flies in it. Oh, and throw some rocks in there. Rocks say old.”
Fly Fishing Guides are Masters of Pointing Out the Obvious
Guide: “Look at that Sasquatch over there.”
Client: “Isn’t it lovely. I will now smile. You are a fantastic guide, of fly fishing.”
(Sorry Spencer. That pic is just too good.)
Fly Fishing is, Well, Not Really Fly Fishing
My favorite fly is a Creek Chub Darter…under a bobber.
This is THE Fly
Fishing flies all look just like this, because this looks just like a fly. Also, fish love yellow, red and polka-dots. Everyone knows that.
Fly Fishing is Just Like Business
I can just see the meeting notes.
Bi-Annual Super Sales Meeting Minutes
Time: 3:17 PM (running 67 minutes behind schedule)
Topic: How to Business
– Roger Dimwitty, Director of Business, Important States Region
Roger proposed idea for a new campaign. He suggests we can make a direct mail flyer showing that business is just like fly fishing. Says direct mail is where it’s at these days. Suggests the theme should be a man with his mouth wide open underwater trying to eat a hook. Suggests we call this campaign “Fishing for Business” Man should have floating tie, indicates underwater.
– Samantha Brainlacky, Director of Business, Stuff Division
Recapped Roger’s idea, then made sure the CEO, Mr.Obtusestman, was looking and recapped again with some other even more businessy words (proved she’s smarter and more engaged than everyone else in the room). Then, suggested more out-of-the-box paradigm-shift ideation and questioned the conventional wisdom of campaign (proved she’s even smarter than before) because it doesn’t include enough reference to businessosity, bandwidth and actionable insights. Suggests that instead of just a hook it should be a hundred dollar bill, on a hook. Also, it should “pop” more. Recapped this idea with some very bussinessy words. Ended by stating that, all boiled down, business equals money.
Remainder of Sales Team enthusiastically concurred.
Proposal is directed to Marketing for immediate execution of strategy.
– Moustachio Hipsterman, Marketing Director, Brands
Objected to premise of proposed campaign. Used 6 acronymns and the phrases “core competency” and “drinking the Koolaid” to explain his objection. Concluded with “It basically makes no sense.”
– Frederick Obtusestman, CEO
Noted objection by nodding and staring blankly in the general direction of Mr. Hipsterman. Stated that he is both “heard” and “validated” in his thinking. Overruled Mr. Hipsterman’s objection because Mr. Obtusestman says this is literally the most brilliant strategy ever. He went fly fishing once, and it was just like business.
Mr. Hipsterman says he will try to find a suitable stock photo.